I pull out the scale and step on: Ok, extreme disappointment with the piddley two pounds I have lost. Two Pounds! I would have thought that the herbal laxative alone would have helped me drop at least 4 pounds. I hang my head back, look up at the ceiling and confirm my steely, virtuous resolve. Move on.
Today I am craving Bread: whole wheat, pita, baguette, Wonder. Anything that is yeasty and flour based and smelling of warmth and wonderfulness is making my mouth water. This seems to have replaced the thumping headache from yesterday. Not sure this is better, however.
The New Gal on the morning Starbucks shift doesn’t know me so I don’t get the Green Tea Idiot-Slap this morning. I have brought last evening’s left-over Fish Chowder and two crunchy rice cakes as lunch today and inundate the office with a micro-wavey, fishy yet virtuous smell. A well meaning and usually generous co-worker from my office has zipped over to the Market over lunch and purchased
two dozen poppy seed bagels from St. Urbain Bagel: Ohhh not today, please. Please.
I slog through the afternoon of conference calls and budget prep with reasonable resolve. I keep my litre bottle of water at the ready and continue to grind a groove into the hallway between my desk and bathroom. I pack my brief case and head up to a 6 pm volunteer meeting with a brisk walk (again, a virtuous attempt at justifying combining some exercise with the detox and cleanse) and stop at my ‘Local’, on the way to the meeting for something to eat. I have realized that it is important that I keep maintaining my daily eating schedule and to supplemental snacks of almonds and carrots and celery sticks in-between times.
I belly up to the bar and Trish asks me “the usual?” “No thanks, a big Soda Water with some lime and the menu”. “Really? What’s up?” “Detox and Cleanse, day 4 of 12”, I cheerily confirm. Trish knows me well enough not to push and she doesn’t. I order a salad with extra lemons on the side for dressing, a grilled breast of chicken on top and pat myself on the back for surviving the temptation of a half pint with my meal. Good for me. Good-for-virtuous-me.
I regale the attendees at my meeting with my cleansing details and head for home to take my evening’s course of bitter pills and herbal tincture. Test number 1 faced and passed. I can do this.
Detox well my friends.